Learning to Love and Live the Questions

A couple of nights ago one of my cousins posted a link to an article and invited discussion about its topic.  The article was about the controversy that is currently stirring in Florida surrounding a girl with a severe allergy to peanuts.  [Click here to read the article] [Click here for video]

The short version of the story is that many parents of (non-allergic) children who are in the same class as this 6 year old 1st grader feel that their children’s rights are being compromised by this young child being permitted to attend their public school.  My knee jerk reaction to my cousins post was:

Where do I begin???? (Yeah, I think you know my thoughts regarding this.) Unfortunately Facebook is a family place and I won’t be able to censor my comments …. Breathe, Sue, breathe!

Now, in the essence of full disclosure, I have a child with a severe food allergy.  The slightest contact with the food that my child is allergic to would most definitely result in a hospital stay and, could, result in death.  My child has dealt with people not understanding the life threatening reality that she lives with every day of her life.  We have had to educate our family members, teachers, parents, and students about her life threatening allergy.  Some have understood it – others have not.  Some have supported measures that were taken to ensure her safety and others have tried to get her to eat that which would kill her cause they simply didn’t believe it was that big of a deal. Needless to say, I have passionate feelings surrounding this topic.

However, I know that even if I did not have a child with a food allergy I would have no problem modifying things to help keep another child safe.  It’s simply about having compassion for another.  It’s simply about community.

Now, after I let the initial report mull around in my head for a little while I decided that there had to be more to the issue.  There had to be other issues for parents to react so much as to form picket lines with their kids outside the school holding signs like “Our Kids Have Rights Too.”  Yes, they do.  I began to wonder what “rights” are being taken away from their kids.

From what I can tell the process to used to keep this child safe is quite simple. The two 1st grade class rooms have been made “nut free zones.”  What that means is simply no nut products are allowed in either classroom.  The rights that are being taken away – as the parents of the other children state – are their children cannot bring snacks that have nuts in them.  Hmmm – is what snack you bring into school actually considered a “right”?  Last time I looked I did not see “snack choice” as a right.  Come to think of it, at the beginning of the school year my children’s teachers sent home a list of appropriate snacks (apples, carrots, “cereal bar”, etc) and inappropriate snacks (chips, pudding, soda, etc.)  Were my children’s rights being infringed upon?  Should I have picked up my picket sign and stood on the side of the road across from my children’s school with my kids demanding that they be able to bring whatever snack they wanted?  No! Of course not! Such “regulations” regarding snacks are designed to help kids eat things that are healthy for them.

Although nuts may be healthy for some they are deadly for others.  If they want their kids to have a “nut” snack how about having it be their after school snack?  It’s a small accommodation but definitely not an infringement upon your child’s rights.

Its funny – do these parents not see the overwhelming accommodations that this child and her parents are making to keep her safe?  She does not go down to the cafeteria for lunch.  The school has not designated the cafeteria to be a “nut free zone”.  The family has not asked for that – even though they could.  They have chosen to have their daughter eat lunch in the safety of the classroom with the classroom aide.

The leads us into the other major area of concern: all the kids in both of the 1st grade classes are required to wash their hands 2 times per day . . . before they go into the classroom at the beginning of the day and before they re-enter the classroom after lunch.  Hmmm – isn’t that just good hygiene?  Isn’t that a practice that will also help diminish the spread cold and flu viruses? Again, I wish my kid’s school made that a requirement.  How is helping your child be clean an infringement on their rights?  I don’t get it!

I wonder the reasoning for the other signs that I saw parents having their children hold in the picket line.  ”No Dogs.”  Why on earth would that be there?  Are they trying to equate this young child with being a dog?  With being “less than”?

Then there is the one that reads “Who is paying for all these extra measures?” Last time I checked asking kids to bring in certain snacks and to wash their hands does not cost the taxpayers any extra money.  If the concern is that the child has an aide sitting with her while she eats in the  classroom without any other kids – the aide is there anyways – that, again, does not cost anything extra.

All that aside . . . what are these parents teaching their children by protesting this issue?  Are they teaching them compassion, are they teaching them understanding, are they teaching them the concept of community, are they teaching them to care for their fellow classmate?  Are they teaching them the importance of understanding that everyone is made different and it is important to understand those differences?  No.  I fear they are teaching their children that the health of another does not matter.  I fear that they are teaching their children that they should never have to make any sort of accommodation for another person.  I fear that they are teaching their children that life is simply about what “I” want and everyone else can just deal.  I fear that they are teaching their children that it appropriate to classify people into the category of “other.”

It makes me wonder – what if their child was in this position?  And, I’m not simply talking about a food allergy.  What if their child needed the help and support of their fellow classmates in order to keep them safe, for any reason? Would they hold a different position?  Of course they would.

My heart is breaking for this little girl.  My heart is breaking for her family. And, my heart is breaking for a society that once again continues to place people in the box of “other” – finding ways to demonize people for being born different from them.

~ by suetamilio on March 24, 2011.

Posted in Lent
Tags: Children, Community, Compassion, Edgewater, Florida, Food Allergy, Peanut Allergy, Safety, School